Post updated January, 2026
Why Chores Are Essential to Your Child’s Development
And how the Six Steps™ make chores stick
“Are my kids spoiled?”
Even as a parent coach, I’ve asked myself that question.
It’s easy to blame modern culture—busy schedules, screens, softer expectations. But when parents want kids who are independent, capable, and confident, the most effective changes usually start at home.
One of the simplest, and most powerful, tools?
Chores.
Why Chores Matter More Than We Think
Most parents believe chores are good for kids.
A national survey by Braun Research found:
82% of adults had chores growing up
75% believe chores made them more responsible
63% say chores taught valuable life lessons
And yet only 28% require their own children to do chores.
That gap matters.
Because chores aren’t about keeping the house clean.
They’re about building responsibility, confidence, and follow-through.
Chores Build Skills Kids Can’t Learn Any Other Way
When kids have regular responsibilities, they learn:
How to contribute to a family
How to manage time
How to follow through even when they don’t feel like it
That they are capable and needed
Those skills don’t come from lectures.
They come from practice.
Why Chores So Often Turn Into Power Struggles
Most parents don’t struggle with knowing chores matter.
They struggle with:
Resistance and refusal
Constant reminding
Arguing and negotiating
Inconsistent follow-through
That’s not a motivation problem.
It’s a structure problem.
And this is where the Six Steps™ matter.
Over the years, I’ve found that chores work best when parents follow a clear, parent-led structure. I call this the Six Steps™ not as a program, but as a practical way to move from expectations to follow-through without power struggles.
How the Six Steps™ Help Chores Actually Work
The Six Steps™ provide a clear, parent-led structure so chores don’t rely on nagging, bribes, or yelling.
Here’s how they apply to chores:
Step 1: Clarify Expectations
Kids need to know exactly:
What the chore is
When it needs to be done
What “done” looks like
Vague expectations create resistance.
Step 2: Teach Before You Expect
Training is part of leadership. Not something you skip because “they should know by now.”
Model the chore. Practice together. Then step back.
Step 3: Create a Simple Plan
Chores work best when they’re predictable.
A weekly plan helps kids:
Anticipate responsibility
Reduce anxiety
Build routine
Step 4: Communicate Calmly
This isn’t a family vote.
A short, steady explanation during a family meeting sets the tone:
“Everyone in this family contributes.”
No over-explaining. No negotiating.
Step 5: Follow Through Consistently
This is where most systems fall apart.
If chores aren’t done:
Privileges pause
Parents stay calm
Consequences are predictable
Consistency, not intensity, creates change.
Step 6: Reflect and Adjust
After a few weeks, reflect:
What’s working?
What needs adjusting?
Are expectations realistic?
Reflection builds ownership for parents and kids.
Want Help Putting the Six Steps™ Into Action?
Knowing the steps is one thing.
Implementing them consistently is another.
If chores have been a constant battle in your home, the Six Steps™ Chores Worksheet walks you through:
Clarifying expectations
Assigning age-appropriate responsibilities
Creating a simple, workable plan
Following through without power struggles
👉 Download the Six Steps™ to get started.
When Chores Are Done Right
Within a few weeks, most families notice:
Less arguing
Fewer reminders
More cooperation
Greater independence
And kids don’t just help more, they feel more capable.
That’s the real goal.
