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The Perfect Age for Smart Phones

Susan Morley· 2 minutes
Parents want parenting advice on when their child should get a smartphone.
I used to say kids should have the cell phones THEY can afford. If they can afford to purchase and pay for a smartphone, then by all means, they should have one. My assumption is that if a 10-year-old can afford an $800+ phone and the $150/month bill to pay for that phone, he will also have enough self-discipline and emotional regulation that he won't spend all day looking at free porn.

But that's me. And to be completely frank, that's not what happened in my home. I'm divorced and there was no convincing my ex and his wife that they shouldn't be the hero and buy our children iPhones. And I suspect in your homes, it's not so easy either.

Nobody knows the perfect age for a kid to have a smartphone. But I can tell you a really good way you can figure it out.

I strongly recommend parents work on and write a mission statement. This will ensure you and your partner know where each of you stands and it will give you a chance to get on the same page.
Then create a vision for each of your children. This work will pay off because you'll be able to look at each child and know that what works with one child won't work with another. This is a good time to remember that "fair" does not mean equality. It means every one gets what he or she needs.
Once that work is done, parents will more easily know what is right for their families regarding cell phones and technology. I know this is not what parents want to hear. Parenting takes work. I can show you HOW to discover your values so you can make those decisions. I cannot show you WHAT decision to make.
Want to learn more about writing a mission statement and creating a vision for your children? Click HERE to get my free Six Steps PDF.
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Susan Morley is a certified parenting coach based in Atlanta, GA. She provides non-clinical parent support for families navigating behavior challenges, screen-time struggles, and emotional dysregulation. If you're searching for a parenting coach near you—or need virtual coaching for strong-willed kids—you’re in the right place.

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